Happiness or Freedom?
And why I might change my title
I had a fascinating conversation with a friend—a client—recently. She doesn’t like the word happiness. She didn’t even realize she was working with a “Happiness Coach.”
I LOVE words. I think they are a powerful force in the world, with many facets and nuances.
How a word makes you feel is more important than what the dictionary says.
On a summer day in 2014, I was sitting on the deck of my new home—a beautiful little cabin/fairy cottage nestled on an Appalachian mountainside in East Tennessee.
It had taken me three years, but I had re-created my life from a desolate place.
In 2011, I was bankrupt, essentially homeless, jobless, hopeless… out of resources, and ready to give up.
But I didn’t.
I put everything else aside and started from scratch, building a simple dream of peace, security, happiness, and freedom.
That day, with my dogs and cats lounging around, the sun shining through the trees, basking in my little paradise, I knew what I wanted to do.
I wanted to teach other women how to feel this joy, contentment, fulfillment, freedom, peace, love…
I was so HAPPY!
“This!” I thought. “This is what these decades of struggle were about. Now I can help other women be happy and free—and not take decades to do it.”
I’m meant to be a Happiness Coach.
I thought I made up that term (clearly I didn’t, and I wasn’t the first Happiness Coach), but that’s the one “title” I’ve never changed since I created my business, Be Happy First.
Over the years, I’ve been a Happiness Coach and:
Women’s Empowerment Teacher
Spiritual Mentor
Success Mentor
Happiness and Primal Health Coach
Masters of Wisdom and Meditation Teacher
Dreambuilder Coach
Life Mastery Consultant…
Many titles showed up as I tried to find my way to the best way to serve.
But Happiness Coach always stayed. The one constant.
Now, I’m reconsidering.
I encounter a lot of words that I reject for different reasons. Not completely—as no word deserves to be banished—but I’m incredibly picky about how they are used.
Some examples:
gratitude
have to
pagan
heathen
witch
worship
deity
right and wrong
religion
strive
God
Just a few from a long list, and I have good reasons for questioning all of them.
So what about happiness?
What do you think or feel when you hear that word?
What image comes to mind when you see the words Happiness Coach?
I am truly, genuinely, authentically, through-and-through happy.
I love my life. I feel free to make my own choices in every moment, and I love my perspective when challenges come along. I feel bountifully equipped to take the dark moments of life and transmute them into richness, depth, and wisdom.
I’m fully immersed in the idea that it’s all about the journey, and I’m good at seeing the lovely and overlooking the negative.
I truly believe that because I look for and choose to emanate kindness, curiosity, interest, love, and compassion, this is what the world gives me.
Does this mean nothing “bad” ever happens to me?
Of course not!
I make costly mistakes all the time.
I meet people who are rude and inconsiderate (very rarely).
I see things I want and can’t yet afford (business or first-class travel comes to mind).
I have fears and insecurities. I get overwhelmed and feel defeated sometimes.
I grieve for people I love and worry for their safety and well-being. Even for their lives.
I succumb to what we call the “Foster Funk” and spend days on the couch, completely checked out.
I honor all of these feelings, but I don’t set up camp and live in them.
I let them be the dark threads in the beautiful tapestry of my life and weave them in with the bright and beautiful.
And I’m happy.
But that’s what happiness means to me.
To you, it might feel shallow or flighty. Like skipping among the daisies, ignoring the war and suffering that’s happening on the other side of the meadow.
It might feel like shaming or denying your sad feelings or dark thoughts.
Maybe the word happiness feels like an unreachable standard…
Only you can decide.
For me… I’m thinking maybe I’ll change that title.
From Happiness Coach to Freedom Coach.
Freedom, of course, also means different things to each of us.
But maybe it feels like a more real, grounded, reachable state of being.
Freedom for me is literal. Unfettered. Untethered. Uninhibited.
I am traveling the world, staying a few days or a few months in new places, experiencing different cultures and landscapes, and questing for the sacred and magical.
It means waking up when I’m rested and going to bed when I’m ready (mostly). Few alarms, no rush, no one else’s schedule.
It means choosing where I go, when I go, and who I spend my time with.
I have enough money to feel spacious and generous, to make choices based on desire and alignment instead of fear or scarcity.
I get to wander, explore, follow curiosity, and let my life unfold in beautiful, surprising ways.
I create my work in ways that feel natural and nourishing.
I have access to endless information and inspiration, friends and collaborators all over the world, and a deep trust that the right connections and opportunities will keep showing up.
I don’t seek to conform or fit in.
I don’t wait for approval or permission.
I follow my own knowing.
And that’s what sets me free.
What do you think?
Would you rather have a guide to help you be happy?
Or does freedom seem to match your longing more accurately?
I’d love to hear your thoughts. Do you have a word—one you use or one you resist—that shapes how you see your own path?
Hit reply or leave a comment and let me know.
And if you’re walking your way toward freedom, I’m right here with you.
🌟 Ways to Connect This Week
🌕 Full Moon Ceremony – A sacred gathering under the light of the full moon to celebrate the blossoming of our New Moon intentions. We’ll reflect, share questions, and explore this month’s theme: Honoring All of You—the tiny, shimmering facets, and the Wild, Wise, and Wounded within.. 🌺
July 10 at 4:30 pm Eastern / 1:30 pm Pacific (Friday, July 11 at 8:30 am NZST)
Follow me on Insight Timer to join live and receive updates:
💬 Book a Free Path-Finding Call – Let’s connect 1:1 and explore what you’re longing to create.
Schedule here
🌿 The Ancestral Path to Health, Happiness & Freedom – A private coaching journey rooted in ancient wisdom and tailored just for you. Longing for more vibrance, energy, joy, and freedom?
Learn more
☀️ Happy & Free on Purpose Life Course – A self-paced journey into joy, embodiment, and sacred living.
Start here